InAdequate
Updated: Jun 28, 2020
Inadequate: lacking the quality or quantity required; insufficient for a purpose.
"God, will you help me? I cannot do this without you!" I cried these words out to God as I tackled a hard task at work. This was not the first time I have had to cry out to God for wisdom and I know it will not be my last time. In the past, God has always given me wisdom when I could not understand how to do a task. This time, the wisdom did not come.
I remember when I went back to college in my thirties. I had been out of school for over twelve years. I was nearing the end of my degree and I finally had to take the dreaded, "Math Class!!"
I have had a fear of math all my life. Word related classes (English, Social Studies, etc) came easy to me but Math would always stop me from being an all "A" student. When I would take a math class, I was happy to get a "C" and that was with a lot of studying. I had just accepted that I was not a numbers person.
One day I was sitting at Cornerstone College trying to figure out what the teacher was doing with these numbers on the board? The "X" Equals "Y" minus this and in order to get the correct answer you must know if you subtract or add first. When I tell you that my level of anxiety went from a 10 to a double 10, that is minimizing the fear I felt. I am a saved intelligent woman but looking at what the teacher was putting on the board, I could make no sense of it. So I prayed my "God help me" prayer and overnight, God gave me the solution I needed. I came back to class the next week and went to the board and solved the problem! The teacher did not understand how I did it, but he said the answer was right. Thank you Jesus!! Won't he do it??
6/24/2020 to ,6/26/2020 at work, I prayed this prayer over and over with no solution. I looked over my spreadsheets that were in front of me and I could not make sense of them. I called my colleague and she helped me make some sense of it, but my mind would not click with understanding. For three days, I would sit in front of my computer and ask God to help me. Some days I cried tears because I felt so inadequate. I am the senior member of my team and I could not grasp this spreadsheet. I already felt challenged because my Excel skills were not up to par. I had been holding my own with the young bloods until this week. I had to admit defeat. This was a wall that I was facing. I could stand there and stare at it or I could develop the skills which will help me to overt