After the morgue came for my grandmother's body, my grandfather had to go home and tell three children their mom was dead. He was still processing the fact that he had three, no four children to raise without a mother. As he walked home, he rehearsed over and over what he would say. There is no right way to deliver news like this. As he got near the house, the pit of his stomach burned from anxiety. He seen the children running and laughing; how could he wipe the smiles off their faces and put tears in their eyes. A man should never have to break his children's heart this way.
The children seen him and started running towards him, dust from the dirt road rising up behind them. "Daddy, Daddy". They grabbed him by his waist, his youngest Goldie looked up smiling at him. His heart lurched in his chest because she looked just like her mother. Jacy his oldest daughter and Jimmy his only son clung to him also. He squeezed them tight and kept walking towards the house. He seen his neighbor Marge come stand on the porch. She put her hand above her eyes to shield them from the bright sun, it reminded him of a soldier's salute. "Marge, I need some time alone with my children" "I have something important to tell them. You gone on home and come back in about 15 minutes." Marge had already heard that Calene, his wife, had died. She grabbed her purse and took her two children with her.
After Marge left, my grandfather gave my aunts and uncle news that would forever change their lives. Those three children did not know what to do. They had lost their mom but had a new sister. Jim, the oldest, struggled with wanting to cry but his Dad said, boys don't cry. He released his pain by saying, "I wished my sister died instead of my mom." Then he ran out the house. Goldie and Jacy were in shock. They were not sure what dead meant. They knew their mother
was not coming home but did that mean they wouldn't see her again. They just knew that their Dad and brother were sad. They cried because their Dad cried. Those three children were now motherless.
A child raised without his or her mother, suffers a loss which cannot be explained. My aunts and uncle lives shifted when my mother Carrie Mae came into the world. My mother's birth, impacted so many lives. It was a miracle that she lived. She was without oxygen for a while, but yet she lived. Her life had purpose, without her there would be no me, The Ruby Girl.